Satirist, writer, and TV host Stephen Colbert has decided to tackle a new niche: children’s literature. Colbert’s latest book “I Am A Pole (And So Can You)” is a coming-of-age tale of a pole’s search for self-purpose. The pole explores his numerous functions: ski pole, totem pole, stripper pole, but none provide the existential fulfillment he desires.

Colbert’s literary endeavour began during his interview with the late Maurice Sendak, author of acclaimed children’s book “Where the Wild Things Are”.

Colbert declared, “Every celebrity is out there cashing in on children’s books and I want in. What does it take for a celebrity to make a successful book?”

Sendak responded, “You’ve started already by being an idiot.”

Colbert proceeded to pitch a (seemingly improvised) draft of “I Am A Pole (And So Can You)” to Sendak.

“The sad thing is, I like it.” Maurice Sendak told him, words that have been utilized as a blurb for Colbert’s book, embroidered on its hard cover in large white letters.

The pitch was originally intended for mere comedic dialogue, but after ample requests by Colbert Report fans, Stephen Colbert teamed up with Grand Central Books in February to produce the unique story in hardcover form. “I Am A Pole (And So Can You)” was released just yesterday, and speculation of its raunchy not-safe-for-children content has already begun to unfurl. But Stephen Colbert’s intentions are certainly genuine.

“The perfect gift to give a child or grandchild for their high school or college graduation,” the author exclaimed.

All proceeds of the book will go directly to USvetsinc, a non-profit organization dedicated to returning troops, and a bountiful donation it will be. The audiobook is narrated by none other than Tom Hanks, sealing the book’s already inevitable success. Like any of Colbert’s affiliated projects, “I Am A Pole (And So Can You)” can be expected to be as compelling and satirically absurd as the comedian himself.

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