August 28, 2014
August 27, 2014
Five highlights from David Soknacki’s Reddit AMA.
New report suggests there will be a second NHL team in Toronto by 2017
Family of missing Toronto woman Kit Currie looking for help
August 26, 2014
Meet Tiny Hearts, the Toronto app studio that’s one of Apple’s favourites
August 25, 2014
Rob and Doug Ford vote against Raptors practice facility
Best Thing on the Internet: Wasted Girl Hooks Up With Tree
But I swear it wasn't me

The Gawker headline on this video is: “Unbelievably Wasted Girl Tries to Have Sex With Tree After Getting in Fight With It”

Yep, that’s exactly what the video’s of. This girl is dirty grinding and making out with a tree at this past weekend’s Ultra Festival in Miami. I wasn’t really sure if she was seriously really messed up, or if she was just putting on a performance until her embarrassed friends find her and usher her quickly away from the growing group of people filming her with their camera phones.

I’m not sure whether to be freaked out, mortified or amused. Well, probs all three at once. What have we learned, children? Don’t get fucked up on mushrooms in the middle of the day and go to a music festival. Oh wait, that sounds amazing. Peace. 

[via Gawker]

____

Jessica Carroll is the Toronto Standard’s “Best Thing on the Internet Today” columnist. Follow her on Twitter at @jssckr.

For more, follow us on Twitter at @torontostandard, and subscribe to our newsletter.

 

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